Leeds Carers Group meets here on the first Wednesday of each month from 2pm – 4pm, with several of our members attending regularly and finding the sessions supportive.
Respite. We try to make our activities as inclusive as possible which means we have been able to offer a supported place for a number of people in some of our groups, enabling their carer to have a regular couple of hours break each week. This is dependant upon space being available and our being able to provide appropriate support safely.
Home Visits are available in support of you as a carer, at times of transition if you feel it would be helpful. Please contact us for more information.
Resources
Leeds and York Partnership NHS Foundation Trust has created a new resource pack for carers. Please download Caring for someone with dementia at home (.pdf)
Living with dementia by Brian Sugden
Living with dementia is the term used for those who have been diagnosed with one or other of the forms of this cruel disease. But, in actual fact, the carers of these people are also “living with dementia” in that their lives are completely ruled by it. And it’s hard, and not just because of the things you find yourself having to do; when you say the words “in sickness and in health, for better or for worse” you have no conception of what you may be signing up for. You never dreamed that you would be dressing and undressing, showering or bathing, supervising toilet visits and cleaning up after the one you are marrying.
The really hard part of this though is seeing the person you love most in the world diminishing before your eyes. You become lonely because conversation died with the diagnosis. The once bright, clever, confident person you have known for so long is gone forever and in their place is someone who looks like them, feels like them when you share a cuddle but is no longer the person they were. As well as caring for them, you are mourning their loss. You look at them sometimes and weep bitter tears because, though you can see them, the one you have loved for years is no longer with you and never will be again. You still love them, as the old song from Oliver says, “when someone needs you, you love them so”, but somehow it’s in a different way.
Equally weird and somewhat scary, is having to make major decisions on your own. Decisions which previously were jointly made after discussing all the implications,
There is help out there, Carers Leeds, the many dementia cafes in the city, Cross Gates Good Neighbours’ Scheme CIO and Garforth NET to name but a few and thank God for them too for, without them, life would be so much harder.
